I have to be careful not to get angry. Non-constructive anger. Jaded, cynical.

I chose to follow my desire to make art. No one is getting rich doing it. Nor the attention they often desire. I don't deserve anything. Thats the first thing to remember. Im fortunate to even consider holding a guitar much less playing one in front of people. Beyond that, playing music I made up. Thats quite wonderful. The more attention you get, the more you realize it doesn't matter. Music still matters. Even when no one is there to listen to it. Sometimes thats the most liberating of experiences. You are beholden to no one. I would like to operate like that.

 

But it is emotional. It is a very close to the heart career. And people don't care about that. Im not sure they should. But what we create is fragile, and us. We are vulnerable.

 

One of the ways we shade this vulnerability is to create personas of stoicism, or anger, or condescension. The truth is none of us really know what we are doing. We believe in what we have chosen to do. We get behind it.

 

So, jumping onwards, in reference to the last BLOG post here -  is it constructive, fair even, to say Rob Thomas sucks? I don't know. Maybe if I am saying we are selling ourselves short in allowing that to be our popular music. I think that is a valid point. But Rob Thomas the person, he could e a really decent guy. Maybe even amazing. (That sounds like one of his song titles "Maybe even amazing"). 

 

Anyway, my dilemma, constantly, is - What is subjective versus objective quality? What is fair for me to say in regards to the art of others as I hope they have a certain reaction to art of my own? You can read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, and there is a strong argument there for the case of subjective quality, but it doesn't seem to have assimilated itself into our common conscious. 

 

Do I just pretend the stuff that I find non-substantive, or just not engaging, or lazy, do I pretend that doesn't exist? No. I have to learn from it and allow it to strengthen my own conviction.

 

Do I tell people what I don't like? I think that is only constructive if I am also telling them what I like. That seems fair. And not out of fear, nor hate (the latter a result of the former). 

 

I can't get so caught up in the music game that I forget about life, and forget about what I feel. Life, emotion, all of it, is the reason I play music that could perhaps be considered worthwhile, and the best of all cases, lasting.

 

So - I don't like the music that is on the CD's that have the name Rob Thomas on them, what I have heard. From what I have heard, I can make a reasonable assumption regarding that which I have not.

    I absolutely love listening to James Blood Ulmer, and Curtis Mayfield . I also like the movie Rainman. 

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